Tips for Twits

Gary and I was in a sales and management class and we were sitting on the same table as a late 30 to 40ish entrepreneur, Greg. When we first introduced ourselves as product managers and designers, he could barely wait for us, these couple 20ish year old kids, to finish our introduction.

Into the class, we worked on a short assignment about selling a product and he went into details into talking about the features instead of higher order benefits. From the start, he was so sure he was to be the one representing the team. He was insistence about his answers. It was obviously wrong in this context and I could see his body language turned from confidence to hostility to frustration as Gary and I cogently put forward our points and the consultant trainer agreeing with us every step of the way.

It was clear that we turned him around and later he became more interested in what we do in Savant Degrees.

This incident had me thinking. When I’m his age, will I have the humility to listen and learn? I believe the only reason why we were able to grow so rapidly in the last few years is because we were like a sponge. We had to learn from everyone, including our peers, our clients, our mentors, our parents etc. Everyone has something to teach and we just need to listen.

I’m writing this now and in years to come, when I’m acting like Greg. Please forward me this.

The Greg Syndrome n. A condition where a person has an inability to learn through open discussion and listening due to pride, ego, seniority, age, expertise(lack of) or a combination of the following.

Good management is not so different from parenting.  It requires plenty of care, attention, mentoring and the ultimate wish for your subordinates to succeed.  Lets take several counter examples we dont consider ineffective:

1. The Angry Manager – Potentially an army Sergeant Major/Disciplinarian
   Approachable – Not without a death wish. Count on for good advice – Unlikely. Motivating – Hell no.
   Overall management capabilities – Terrible.
   The angry manager has only 1 trick up his sleeve, anger and punishment. Thus his management capability is only as good as his ability to enforce his punishment (which is never as easy to enforce in the real world without a steady stream of recruits). GE and Goldman Sachs may be able to pull this off, where their guys are self motivated, intelligent and a world of remuneration awaits them. Otherwise, i wouldn’t advice you to try.
2. The Heart Surgeon Manager - Only useful when something goes wrong. Tries to find every excuse to install a pacemaker
   Approachable – Moderate. Count on for good advice – Unlikely. Motivating – No
   Overall management capabilities – Moderate
   The heart surgeon manager works on a more corrective schedule. He only enters the scene when a problem has already occurred and often working in this constraint this leads him to find the quickest and least painful fix to things. Sure he manage progress and provides lots of healthy tips but that’s ultimately it. The heart surgeon has no interest in your overall health. Just your heart’s
3. The  Buddy Manager - Great for feedback and drinks with
   Approachable – Yes. Count on for good advice – Yes. Motivating – Yes
   Overall management capabilities – Great
   Whats wrong then? The buddy manager is always perceived at a common level and is too friendly for his own good. Without being in an environment of perfect work ethics and discipline, the buddy manager is easily undermined and will find increasing difficultly in establishing his authority. Sure you can have beer with the man, but it may be him telling you his sorrows instead.

Enter the parental manager. What are their qualities?

• Parents are meaningfully authoritative. They tell you quickly when you do something wrong. It shouldn’t be challenged. They only exercise their authority in utmost necessity and you trust that. Not a moment more flippant.
• Parents are great listeners. They genuinely want to know more about you, about how you think, about what you experienced. They’re never judgemental. Only with that can they fix your premises instead of your surface problems.
• Parents are sages. They don’t always have the answers and they don’t presume they have yours. They’d tell you how they would break down the problem with their years of experience and offer you guidelines. Most importantly, they want you to come to the conclusion yourself, instead of always teaching you the answer.
• Parents have the patience of Buddha. Well, only if you ask right. They’re more about the journey than the destination and they’ll help you back on your feet every single time you fall, pat you on the back and tell its alright. All they ask in return is, try your very best.
• Above all else, they love and care for you. It’s always been about making sure you succeed.

Their effects are undeniable. Admittedly, not everyone has the honor and opportunity to be the child and even less people have the aptitude and self-restraint to be a parental manager. Yet it is a role that everyone should strive towards. I’d caution readers to be more humble before jumping forward to exclaim “I am already such a parental manager”. God knows i’ve been trying since forever. If you are, congrats, I salute you and you’ll know exactly what this post is talking about, otherwise think about your relationships with your subordinates and ask if they function on such an existence.

Applied correctly, it is extremely rewarding and fulfilling.